CKS is a bold new sniping game which breaks sniping tradition by having you do as little actual sniping as possible. You’ll be required to take on a number of targets and, as often as not, you’ll clumsily gun them down with an assault rifle or other gaudy tool of death, just like real snipers don’t.
“Dad came back from the war a vegetable, I swore I’d never turn out the same way.”
The protagonist is a potato headed berk named Gruffles Testosterone. Apparently he’s too tired of the military’s red tape and protocols and just wants to murder a few chumps. Luckily some private military core bint has hired Grizzle McMurderclogs to take pot shots at thugs in the street. I’m pretty sure there is an actual plot underneath all the stupid pretence of taking down gangs but my brain was too advanced to really comprehend it, I might as well have tried to understand a baby’s sense of humour or what dogs dream about.
I have to say that I purposefully failed to snipe people at most points. I preferred to shoot at people and miss, or get them in the foot. Somewhat roleplaying a bumbling buffoon of a sniper who keeps dropping bullets everywhere. I wanted the PMC to reconsider their hiring policy and maybe screen people for neurological defects before employing them, there’s a game idea in there somewhere.
Speaking of neurological defects, I find shooting dudes in the dick endlessly entertaining.
It’s the small things in life that count. *Raise eyebrows for double entendre*
About 3 missions in I was required to plant a bomb, I did so and then decided to just stand around and wait. The enemy guards riddled me with bullets for a minute and a half. The bullets might as well have been feathers because they did sod all damage and I continued to stand defiantly. They should have been terrified. One day I will play a game where enemies freak out if you just soak up bullets like the fucking terminator.
After absorbing thousands of pounds worth of bullets, the timer hit 00:00 and the bomb hilariously failed to explode. The men kept shooting at me with their airzookas, slowly nipping away my health. At 10% health, I realised that I was actually invulnerable and ended their meaningless lives with a sigh. It really cheapened the already worthless game for me. It’s not a game if you can’t sodding lose. Even my toaster can fail if I press the buttons incorrectly. Oh and then the bomb exploded.
5 human beings died to allow for this beach ball sized explosion to partially scorch a bin and some bollards.
I could literally do more damage than this in real life by myself, without a gun.
Oh and it’s barely worth mentioning at this point but as the sun shines and the grass grows, the leaves fall and the rivers flow, tonnes of trivial bullshit exists to be bought for this game with real money. Nutters and 7 year olds of the gaming world rejoice.
Don’t play this stupid non-game. Chuck on a load of washing, it’ll take more effort but it will be more rewarding that this casserole of bollocks.
Games Whinge 